last night, i found out the identity of the name actress who got a project a) i was close to getting and b) was very close to my heart. to no one’s surprise, i placated myself with tears and wine.

the name is a talented person who’s work i’m moderately familiar with, so it’s not one of those what-the-fuck-were-they-thinking choices - it’s just…i dunno. every once in a while a project comes along that you, and those around you, just know you’re perfect for. this was one of those. it felt as though the stars had aligned.

i expected to be over these feelings this morning. obviously not. sigh.

normally, i don’t talk about these things here which is bad? good? i’m unsure. it definitely lifts the veil of the seemingly fancy “hollywood” life (which i’m always a fan of undercutting). lately, though, there have been a ridiculous number of THISCLOSE bookings, only to lose them to names. it’s aggravating to be so close to a new level and feel powerless to affect change.

the good news is that i’m still in the running for another show that is shaping up to be equally awesome. it looks like it’ll have a longer shelf-life, too. so fingers crossed.

thanks for listening to me blather. it’s one of those days.